If ever, you was to remember me, give me a msg alright? I will always be here for you. (:

I guess it a fact that i really cant forget. :/

Tonight I want to cry.

Got to see - today. Feel the emptiness , it sucks. What actl went wrong. I could never ever return back to the past again. Why cant this feeling just die off, sometimes i just feel like ending my life. Really wish i could get more positive, but the fact is i cant. I am jealous of ppl who are in a sweet relationship. :/ Envious. I aint as happy as I look. If I had done this and never done that, maybe - . If I had know how to understand girls thoughts better,that will be so great.

Pardon me ppl. This makes me feel better :/

Hate this year alot, have no more basketball training, no more council. I miss the times.

150208. There is just too many things that will remind me of - . ITS HARD TO FORGET! REALLY IT IS HARDDDDDD!!! No matter how ppl console, it still comes back to you whether you can do it. The fact is I cant. Someday I will just breakdown.

Another hurdle.

Getting jealous? Yes I am. I am a human. Feeling unbearable at times, because I dont know how to release the pain. Friends are the best at this time, it helps talking to them.

It was my first, i was just searching may way through this relationship. I know nothing about making a girl happy, or what will make them really upset. I dk how to!

Its over so long yet I am not getting over it. I was waiting for the right time, to get back again, but now..i cant.

no.11 post with 'misses you' :/

I AM WILLING TO DO ANYTHING TO GET YOU BACK
its impossible now. sometimes i thought getting run down by a car, maybe this will earn your concern.

Its hard, really hard. For today I can, but at the next moment...it comes back again. Foolishness I know, i was the one who cause this. You know, I still love you.

Sometimes watching a happy romance drama serial on tv. How I wish I was the one. Emptiness. :/

I will be right here waiting. Really I will.

Its better to have some hope left, than to know the truth

Day is getting longer. Body going against me. Slight fever 38.5degrees, hah hope this continue so i can dont go to school. But dont thk will happen, I seem to recover pretty fast whenever i fall ill. Have yet to see the doctor, but i have ate a pandol-fast relieve, haha.

Back to normal self! Laughing away in class. I cant keep myself sad or angry for a long period of time, i find it tiring. And that shld not be the way life is, live your life with a smile. Morning started unexpectedly with an assembly. When the annoucement was made, everybody was jumping and clapping cos it meant that chinese lesson is cancelled .

But went down and get thrashing instead. Miss Tham! It is not in any way motivating, it got us mroe depressed instead. Her face was totally f. I am more paid mroe attention on finding her neck instead of her trashing. Haha. Kidding. That was what shawn told me. Jokes. Miss Tang continue ltr on, hers was loooots more better

English . Haha i was smiling my way through out the whole lesson. And mdm priya goes " Gavin can you stop smiling. I am not interested, neither am i aroused nor intrigue by it" And she gave that look, Haha. Her english lesson was interesting. Her sarcastic comments and looks just keep me awake. :P

Mr Woon is absent from school today, and so will he for the next 2 days. Free period instead.

Self study today, was taken over by Social studies remedial and Geog mapping. Tiringgg. Hope tml weijian will play ball in school. I dyingly want to BALL ! (:

Missing ":P" on my phone. The prank calls.

Slowly. Controlling. Restricting.

Get into sleep only at ard 2am. My 2am equals to other ppl 4am. I seldom sleep so late, I just cant get myself to sleep. Flip and turn on my bed, and eventually became tired.

Slowly getting back to my normal self. Using studies to numb myself, blasting music exceptionally loud. Hah this can actl stop me from thinking of other things. I dont believe one can forget abt something so quickly? So I time will be the remedy!

Lesson is extremely long today, and i didnt sleep early the previous night. Thought today i am gg to fall dead in class. Manage to get through the lessons without sleeping, but i was pratically day dreaming for almost an hour during English.

Today lesson wasnt that boring, chemistry we had to carry out our experiment we made. Haha i made a mess on my bench. I guess i wasnt a good bench partner, i was stealing things from gladwin. Not stealing lar, i did ask. He is good to borrow me the things. In the end he had to get the things himself again. Haha.

Feeling the sense of urgency for physics already. I started doing assesments, and asking question for physics. Yes! Finally i am getting back on track.

Recess didnt eat much again, the food isnt nice, and i have no appetite. Treat as a diet (: I am gettng fatter each day

English for the last 2 hours. Just when the lesson was about to start, i was almost falling asleep. But Mdm Priya is funny. Haha. She said this sentence " Stephanie, you thk you funny? Ey it rhymes " and everybody laughs. Today was all about speech writing. At last something diff from report wrting , compo, compre.

Self-study have started. Stayed back till 4pm to self study. Did physics. I finish a 100 questions, it wasnt easy by the way.

It's weird why I could only feel it now. :/

Painful. Jealous. Misery. Regrets. Empty.

just hoping for a place to cry it all out. I aint that strong afterall.

Thoughts of the past- stupid horse; donkey.
150393 . Tears fell down when i looked back into the archives-link; lizard. Feeling aint that good, cos i was the one who caused this.

Hah! thanks bangalah and deloras for last night. Appreciate alot.

When you're gone, the peices of my heart is missing you

Back aching like mad. Old injury back again. Will have a torturing this few days. You will see me sitting up straight. Luckily i still have the painkiller at home. Hope in recover soon. Not fun at all, i cant even bend down to get things. Maybe bend abit.

Had a bad morning. Skipped the morning. Back to normal self after PE. PE was fun, played with bangalah only, cos the others didnt change into their attire. Yes i have found the touch. Haha. Lol. Time just passes so fast when it is PE

Recess next. Yeah clique reunion, 11 ppl sat togetehr for recess. Only 1 wasnt there, clement lah. Diarrhea. Didnt eat during recess, didnt have the appetite. Clique sang a loud loud birthday song for filbert. Haha 16 year old alrdy. Yeah NC16 shows. Kept the birthday cake for lunch.

Ss to end the boring day, didnt do my homework. Damn it. I isnt as nerd as most think, i dont do my homework :P Stupid teacher, ask me to stay back and do 2 ESSAYS! Copy lo, it was her who ask me to copy, not i wnat to copy. Haha

Actl wanted to go home, but just as i was to step out of the school, i heard duqun calling me. I haven eat the cake. Went to eat the cake. Waited for zhiye first. Haha cut the cake, everybody had to use the board of the box to eat, i got the plate and the knife to scoop the cake. Haha even filbert wasnt an exception.

Ytdy, got to go out. Went to visit marcus with eileen siying clement. Clement was damn late. In the mean while, talked to sy and eileen, haha I am not despicable to go ask her. And i will never ask. Talk about relationship, they are both jokers.

Clement came 30minutes after we reached, went to marcus house for dinner. Brought some fruits. Forget to buy a shoe! Haha. If you didnt know, marcus have just gone for a knee injury, send him a msg (: Played with jojo. Jojo is marcus dog. I thk jojo like me huh? She keep following me ley, climb on to my leg somemore.

Watch some R rated stuff at marcus room, lol joking lar. Actl is ghost movie. Went for blog hopping , while clement play with marcus leg. Went home ard 930pm . Bus back with clement and siying. I like big light bulb ley. Their conversation make my goosebums stand. Heeehee.

Marcus rest well (: Hope to see you in school soon.


I didnt break up with you bcos i like someone else. I gave it up, cos I thought i wasnt being a good boyfriend.And it suck big time, when you use those words on me.

Hurts. It went right through.

I didnt. The feeling sucks. Yes i initiated the break, I was the asshole, the bastard, but I didnt said that!

:P

Its digging into my wound.

FUCK.

If you love something, let it go.
If it comes back to you, its yours forever.
If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be.
joke

I wonder why have I woke up so early, its only 750am. Should have laid in my bed till 9. Tuition later on. For 2 long hours, then have to go back again at 230pm for more drilling. It sucks. A total of 4 hours.

Tml tuition worst, 4 and half hours. Adding on to my misery, there is a test for chemistry. The teacher threatens that if you fail then we do not have to go for tuition already. Have everyone studied? I had, relieved.

Ytdy meet-the-parents session just put me into deep shit, the teacher ask me not to go out so often when i already had activities for the later part of the day. Hope my mother wouldnt stop me. On the way to school, and back from school, she is nagging non-stop. Can't stand it.

After tuition will be visiting marcus i believe? Buy him a shoe. Haha. Then meet up the rest of the clique to super bowl. Lastly steamboat at bugis, maybe food can pressure down my thoughts. Hah! Looking forward to seeing clique, they never failed to make me drown in the laughters. No one feels sad gg out with clique :P

Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop

Having a bad day

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I give up. I will delete everything that could make me think of you.